Hello and welcome to my very first blog post on this here website, I am an avid NBA fan and will be posting my musings every Friday. If you enjoy what you read then tell everyone, if you don't then I ask you kindly to shut it.
There are thirty total teams in the NBA, and each of those have twelve players. Or fifteen. Somewhere between twelve and fifteen. And the games. So many games. The point is that there is too much to keep track of for a normal functioning adult who has to go to home depot, your kids' soccer games, or a hundred other things on the weekends. However that's where I, as a currently unemployed twenty-something come in. I watch games, and pass on this incredibly valuable knowledge to you so that you can sound like a genius around the water cooler, or drone on to your significant other till they fall asleep at night. Anyhow, in this piece, I shall be talking about two normal sized human beings that don't get much recognition despite having some very aesthetic games: CJ McCollum and Kemba Walker. So without further adieu...
CJ McCollum, Portland TrailBlazers
(this photo may or may not be from his high school days)
6-3 Shooting Guard
all stats are from current 2017-2018 season
Normal Person Stats:
21pts/4reb/3ast
44% overall from the field
41% from three
87% from the line
Lame Nerd Stats*:
16.3 P.E.R. (Player Efficiency Rating)
53.8% TS (True Shooting)
26% USG (Usage Rate)
2.9 WS (Winshares)
*I am now going to explain the lame nerd stats for the uninitiated. I highly suggest skipping this section.
"Player Efficiency Rating"(P.E.R.) is an older stat that attempts to amalgamate all box score stats into one number, generally placing efficiency over usage, but high volume scorers who maintain a decent efficiency can inflate their P.E.R. , moreover it is scaled throughout the league each season, with the overall average being set at fifteen every year. Created by John Hollinger, the Nerdfather of NBA basketball, and current VP of basketball operations for the Memphis Grizzlies.
True Shooting( TS%) is for you lazy nerds out there who don't want to look at three different shooting percentage numbers. It combines two point percentage, three point percentage, and free-throw percentage into one stat. How you ask? Like this (warning: math)
Usage rate (USG%) is the percentage of possessions a player uses while on the court that end up in a shot,free throw, or a turnover. Twenty percent is league average( five players on the court...duh), with good players generally having larger usage rates and worse players having lower usage rates. This is basically a ball hog rate.
And finally, Win Shares (WS). I don't know what these are or how you get them but the higher the better. And we are moving on.
Ugh I feel like I just pushed my car home with the e-brake on. Okay, CJ McCollum! Silky smooth guard with a really nice handle, great jump shot and an assortment of tricks he uses between the rim and three point line. He may be the best mid-range guard in the NBA. Don't believe me? Watch this. Number 3. In white. He has a spotlight on him. Also he is dribbling the ball.
He is right handed. That is a left handed floater while going full speed at the basket. You know how difficult it is to do things with your off hand? Really difficult. One time I tried writing my name with my left hand, went to show my girlfriend and she replied "If you don't have a job by the end of the week we are going to have to talk. Also what the hell is this scribble?" Left handed stuff is hard.
Now I know what you are thinking, "yeah that left handed floater was nice, but you know what would really sell me on this guy? Him driving with one hand and then finishing in a really unorthodox manner with the other hand. Against the best team in the league." Way ahead of you.
He starts way out on the floor, hits the defender( Golden State Warriors rookie who is six-foot eight) with four crossovers, then drives to his off hand side and finishes with a fade away bank shot over the help defender( Andre Igoudala) who had come in from the weak side, all at full speed.
Convinced of his mid-range prowess yet? Wait. I know what you want. You want a step-back. Everyone wants to see a step back. Here you are.
Satisfied? He'll make at least one of these beauties a game. Also, pro tip for cat owners: The step back is a very useful counter for when you are playing with your cat and you sense that your feline's mood has changed from jovial to murderous, at which point you execute the step-back, thereby escaping the dreaded "gore range". Also CJ McCollum has a cat (Maybe?).
His game also has a certain feel to it. He is always in control, never really turns the ball over, and can make shots regularly that the rest of the league is taking less and less of (difficult two-pointers). Between his skill set and shot selection, Mr. McCollum is rather unique, and a player I would highly recommend watching.
So why haven't you heard of him? Well, despite him being great on mid-range shots, he probably takes too many of them, which hurts his overall efficiency( In case you haven't heard three points is worth more than two points). Moreover he is below average athletically( speed,leaping ability,length) which means he doesn't finish around the rim particularly well and he doesn't get to the free throw line, the two things most efficient scorers excel at. Also there is a reason I didn't show any clips of him passing. Or playing defense.
But he's dope. I pinky swear.
Kemba Walker, Charlotte Hornets
6-1 Shooting Guard
all stats are from current 2017-2018 season
Normal Person Stats:
21pts/3reb/6ast
42% overall from the field
34% from three
84% from the line
Lame Nerd Stats:
19.9 P.E.R. (Player Efficiency Rating)
54.9% TS (True Shooting)
26% USG (Usage Rate)
3.7 WS (Winshares)
Now where CJ McCollum is smooth and controlled, Kemba Walker is, not that. Let's just say that spotlighting Kemba was significantly more time consuming than it was for CJ. Exhibit A: Number 15 in blue. Purple. Teal? Teal.
He just made mincemeat out of three separate spurs defenders in under two seconds. Hes one of those guys that could backpedal faster than you could run in a straight line. His speed and change of direction are such that they make you question the world around you. I mean Rudy Gay, the poor soul whom Kemba spun around, went from thinking "This is fun. I am a professional basketball player" to "Who am I. What is Life. Do my actions really have any meaning? Or am I but a speck in the middle of infinite crushing loneliness?".
Can he shoot though? Poignant question, convenient imaginary person. While his shooting numbers aren't quite up to par as our best friend forever CJ's are, that is partially because he is on a worse team where decent shots are harder to find. Moreover, Kemba is the primary option while CJ gets to play off Damian Lillard( who is the best player on Portland) for about half his minutes.
You didn't answer my question. Fine. Yes, yes he can. While he is having a slightly down year from three ( he shot thirty-nine percent last year), he takes and makes the long ball at a nice rate and volume. Even off the dribble...
And splash. As all true NBA nerds know the ability to consistently make this shot off a high screen and roll really messes up defenses, throwing whole schemes out of whack (see Curry, Stephen). Kemba can make this shot at a decent clip.
And unlike our buddy CJ, Kemba gets after it on defense. He is difficult to set screens on, and the combination of foot speed and force with which he at plays allows him to excel in cutting off driving lanes, closing out defensively, and denying the ball to the man he is covering. However his diminutive size does restrict his ability to switch onto bigger players on defense. Get this: apparently most players in the NBA are large people, and being a normal sized human being has its downsides.
Cool. Where's the stepback? I'm not done yet, Kemba is also an unselfish player who looks to get others involved. Despite being easily the best player on his team, Senor Walker doesn't have an astronomically high usage rate, a sin that would be forgiven given his circumstances. Translation: he is not a ball hog. In fact there are people who say "he plays the game the right way" which reminds me of...
The NBA Color Announcer Drinking Game!
Are you tired of hearing the same dumb meaningless phrases over and over while watching basketball? Are you convinced, like I am, that Reggie Miller and Mark Jackson cannot possibly be human because of their inability to have typical human discourse, opting instead to spit out platitudes and catchphrases like those creepy animatronic gypsy things at carnivals? As with most issues in life, Alcohol offers an answer.
Take a drink whenever the following is mentioned:
that a specific player is "tough" or has a good "motor"
an older player does anything, and the announcer retorts "that's vintage *player's name*"
former player announcer complains about reviewing foul near the basket "Back in my day..."
a player takes any jump shot, and the announcers call it "settling"
announcers refer to a player as "underrated"
the word "analytics" is said as if it is blasphemous
Take two drinks when:
Mark Jackson says "Father time is undefeated"
Mark Jackson says "Hand down man down"
Mark Jackson says "Mama there goes that man"
Mark Jackson says "That's a grown man move"
Reggie Miller says "Welcome to your Kodak Moment"
Reggie Miller says "Are you kidding me?"
Mike Breen says "Bang"( I actually like this one but I must remain objective in my judgement)
Finish your drink when:
Reggie Miller misuses a figure of speech
Jeff Van Gundy stops commenting on the game to remark on one of the celebrities
Mark Jackson brings up how he was fired as the Warriors coach during one of their games
and finally never drink while Hubie Brown is announcing because he is a god damn national treasure and we don't deserve him
Whoa, where was I? Kemba Walker. Stepback. Sure, whatever, here it is.
As a true connoisseur of the step back I must say that this is very impressive. This is definitely more difficult that the one earlier that McCollum performed in the middle of the court. Mainly because Walker is pushing off with his left leg and shooting right handed, which requires a lot of work. Oh and he shot it over a seven footer who mounted a decent contest of the shot. Dopeness.
Well that's about it for this piece. Needless to say if you get the chance to watch either CJ McCollum of Kemba Walker at any time over the next few years you won't be sorry. Thanks for reading, see you next Friday. Or not. Your prerogative.
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